"Excuse me, Sir,
Do you want to help save the environment?"
That was what I was asked the other day whilst I was blissfully perusing through the city. To be honest I didn't think 'the environment' really needed much saving. I mean, the guy was standing on a regular metropolitan street corner... and urbanisation is clearly not under any pressing threat of extinction.
The Environment.
I know, I know, Haaa Ha. He wasn't actually referring to the immediate habitat we found ourselves in. His question instead sought after a more holistic rescuing of the environment. Mother earth. Ecosystems. Eucalyptus. Green tree frogs.
Realising this, I felt it appropriate to respond to him with:
"Ah, not today."
My answer essentially embodied all of the fundamental characteristics required for being a blatantly uncaring, self-obsessed, self-rational, capitalising nature raper. I didn't even qualify this reply with a 'sorry'. I think I would have been better off just throwing a dozen plastic bags in the air whilst taking a dump on a baby seal.
Ergh, what am I becoming? Why is it that a small part of me actually is that blatantly uncaring freak?
To my bemusement, however, my response to this activist was met with a surprisingly large level of acceptance. Like it was somehow expected of me and perfectly okay to not care even slightly.
Do you want to help save the environment?"
That was what I was asked the other day whilst I was blissfully perusing through the city. To be honest I didn't think 'the environment' really needed much saving. I mean, the guy was standing on a regular metropolitan street corner... and urbanisation is clearly not under any pressing threat of extinction.
The Environment.
I know, I know, Haaa Ha. He wasn't actually referring to the immediate habitat we found ourselves in. His question instead sought after a more holistic rescuing of the environment. Mother earth. Ecosystems. Eucalyptus. Green tree frogs.
Realising this, I felt it appropriate to respond to him with:
"Ah, not today."
My answer essentially embodied all of the fundamental characteristics required for being a blatantly uncaring, self-obsessed, self-rational, capitalising nature raper. I didn't even qualify this reply with a 'sorry'. I think I would have been better off just throwing a dozen plastic bags in the air whilst taking a dump on a baby seal.
Ergh, what am I becoming? Why is it that a small part of me actually is that blatantly uncaring freak?To my bemusement, however, my response to this activist was met with a surprisingly large level of acceptance. Like it was somehow expected of me and perfectly okay to not care even slightly.
10 comments:
lol, if anyone searches the word 'dumping' they will arrive at this blog.
Lol at hayley bint's comment.
Brilliant entry. Very Harvey Pekar, which you still need to read. He likes jazz and Jewish culture.
Haha this is hilarious.
I always say "I already am, thanks."
Then they high five me
Okay except for that time you saw me at uni talking to that forest man.
He caught me off-guard
ha the 'ones' at uni are the best, they were there again today!
I still love you, David
i was at garden city the other day and there was a girl trying to sell sponsor children and i think she was working on comission cos she was working really hard hey.. probably the same kind of thing! you should care david, cos it's your people mover fumes that i breathe day to day!
DAVE... where have you been all my life??? what i mean is i should have known about this a LONG time ago... but i get weeks worth of laughs in one day :o) and i have to agree with matt where is your heart??? im not a tree hugging hippee but you could have a least listened to the man for a minute or 2!! OR you could ahve just got the kia driven right upside the guy and let him breathe in the sweet smell of pollution MMMMMMMMMMM
sick mate
from big tim
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